Fatshion Blog

Long ago I had an idea. This idea was to create a safe-haven where fat people could learn the folly of their poor dressing ways. The idea was predicated on the belief that behaving and presenting yourself in certain ways dictates success, happiness and public perceptions both good and bad. This idea, and this idea alone, has lead to the creation of the Fatshion Blog. Learn to maximize your potential in life by maximizing others' perceptions of you.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Power Suits, Power Ties, Power Naps, Power Lies...

Business and formal wear can be the saving grace of a fat man. With a nice suit, shirt and tie, almost anyone can look successful and confident. To make it as easy as possible, let's talk about jackets, shirts & ties, and pants.

While there seem to be so many choices when it comes to suit fabrics and cuts, these are such simple items that it seems unfair to those who don't understand it yet. First, if you own a double breasted suit coat, burn it. Double breasted jackets are, without a doubt, the jacket equivalent of a silk shirt--under no circumstance should one ever be worn by a fat person. Single breasted jackets should always be three buttons, unless the wearer is below 5'8" in height. Jackets with no vent, a single vent or side vents are all acceptable, but well made side vent jackets allow for easy pocket access and less bunching while sitting. If your wardrobe consists of fewer than three suits, you should purchase black, charcoal or navy, but don't be afraid of really distinctive pinstripes. If you're going to have few suits, make them worth while. As a standard rule, you should spend around 2 weeks' salary on your suits.

Shirts and ties are probably where the most gamble takes place. There is a fine line between cutting edge and simply falling off the edge. The key with shirts and ties is not to skimp. Rather than having 12 shirts and 14 ties of low quality, a person would be far better served having 5 custom shirts and 7 ties. Tab collars and collars of a nontraditional nature should be avoided in order to stray away from an ethnic look, and a patterned shirt with a wide spread collar and french cuffs provides a cutting edge, european look. At present, trendy ties are ones that measure at least 3.5 inches across at their widest point, and wide ties always allow you to make good sized, more semetrical knots. Many shorter people may utilize a full windsor knot, however for taller or more rounded people, I recommend a prince albert knot. The prince albert seems to thin out the face because it is a slightly more slinder knot, but it also allows for the best possible dimples just below the knot. Lastly, the tip of the tie should always extend just beyond the top of the waste line. While it's trendy to wear wide ties resting short around the navel, this fashion forward look is absolutely detrimental to anyone with a gut.

Pants are relatively simple. Even with a suit, plain front pants are always the way to go. Pleats, especially while sitting, can lead to a bunched up, cluttered look, while plain front pants can provide a smooth, more modern look. Plain front pants should be hemmed with no cuff at the bottom.

General rules of thumb include the following. On a three button suit, you should only button the middle or top two buttons--never the bottom one. On a two button suit, you should button the top button but never the bottom. When wearing a suit, shirt and tie, only two of the three should be patterened. Having all three with patterns can have a very jumbled effect. As simple as it may sound, you should never have your suit buttoned while sitting, and always wear a belt. Fat people should never wear suspenders or bowties under any circumstance, and sweater vests should be worn with the utmost discretion.

If you follow those few simple rules, you'll probably look forward to getting dressed up like you never have before. In any work or social setting, always try to dress and carry yourself 2-3 positions higher than you already are. As long as you take the early steps to preparing your wardrobe for a high fashion look, you can always look your best, and this will allow others to think the best about you.


At 10:09 PM, Blogger Isaac said...

a few more things to add...

-lapel buttonholes should be straight, not the teardrop kind you can see through.
-if you can afford 5 or fewer suits, make sure they're made of wool. cashmere or linen suits have their role... never buy synthetic fabrics.
-a well made suit can often be defined by its cuff. cheap suits will simply have buttons sewn on. the more buttons and corresponding holes, the nicer the suit.
-shirts should extend beyond the jacket in both the neck and cuff when standing at a resting posture. count on close to 2 inches protruding at the cuff.
-a jacket is buttoned "up" when being put on, and buttoned "down" when taken it off.
-well-fitting trousers should have a single break in the crease when standing.
-don't buy an expensive suit and wear with cheap shoes/socks. socks should be conservative, shoes clean and well-polished.
-flat-fronted trousers are best but forward facing pleats produce a more flattering line than the reverse.


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